Weddings! So much fun, so much food, so much love!
It is interesting to attend a wedding as a married couple. When I was single, I would listen to how sweet vows were and talk about all the little details that had been picked out to decorate the big event. Now as a married woman, I listen to how true and attainable vows are, and my focus is less on the details and a little more on what the meaning of this day is. Weddings take me back to my day. It is such sweet reminiscence of where our love story took its leap into forever, and everything that day held.
Last night I watched a close friend of 15 years marry the woman that completes him. There is something so special about experiencing a moment like that. Watching someone you have grown and laughed with for so long, saying yes to their forever adventure partner. It is one of the biggest decisions of your life, and it takes you into a season that flourishes even stronger when it has the right community as support.
I have a belief that the attendance to a wedding is your promise to stand behind the bride and groom as they enter a new season. It is your promise to be present after the party ends; it is saying “I stand behind you as part of your team”. That is why I love it when the minister leading the ceremony asks those presents “do you stand with this couple as their loving community, do you promise to be a light, a helping hand, and a crying shoulder as they take their vows into marriage, together?”
If there is one thing that I have learned from my two years of marriage, it is that some days it is ridiculously hard to act loving and be a team. Yes, marriage is something beautifully surreal to experience, but some days you are so frustrated and angry that you will want to throw in the towel and punch someone as you storm out the door! There will be days where the enemy finds a spot of weakness and starts to pull at you with temptation. That is a reality in any relationship. It is in these days that we need that loving community that said “I stand with you” to fall back onto as we run to God for guidance for our steps and comfort for our hurting hearts.
That is what I think of when I get a wedding invitation. I have declined invitations if I did not know the couple well and would not be present in their life after the event, or if I was in disagreement with the core values or beliefs of a relationship. Though hard, I respected people saying no to my wedding for these reasons, I believe that honesty is far better than a community that stands with you to party but is not present, or of aligned guidance, when you need a hand to stand.
So! Cheers to big decisions, to love, to community, and to gaining new friends because your current ones marry well!
What are your thoughts on wedding attendances? Share them in a comment below!