It took me two and a half months to invite people to my Facebook Blog page. Why? Because I was nervous. Hesitant that it wasn’t good enough. Fearful that it would be viewed as lame.
It took me weeks to add my best friends to my Instagram Blog account. For the same reasons stated above. And I’m talking about my best friends – people who love me and support me. I was more comfortable connecting with strangers than I was connecting with those closest to me.
These fears are not a reflection of our relationship, they are a reflection of my fear of being judged and criticized. Maybe that comes from the years I spent hearing judgments made of me, or maybe it comes from my need to have everything under control and succeeding by my books before I present it to the world. Likely it comes from the desire to not be labeled another “wanna-be blogger who thinks their opinion is worth something”. But then again, I am the latter. I do think my thoughts have value. I do think reading perspective can lead to better understanding. And I know some of my friends haven’t labeled me “the therapist” just because I look professional in a pair of glasses.
I like analyzing life with people. I like sharing my experiences so others can navigate similar situations with more ease. I like challenging those that open up to me. And I love what God does through community. Part of me laughs at my hesitation! After all, those close to me will love me and those far from me, well, let them be! But the part of me feeling the anxiety is not laughing one bit. Oh boy!
So here is to this new community. To those that love-self help, to those that are trying to better understand Christianity, to those that are angry at the church and want to move forward with a positive mind, to the atheists looking for spiritual understanding, the wedding planner just reading another wedding post, the career woman killing time before a meeting, and the friends who are purely reading this to support me- WELCOME.